| | | | ✅ Today's Checklist: Leadership lessons from top Fortune 500 execs How to protect yourself when your manager can't be trusted The importance of a mentor
🤔 Riddle me this: Children search for me in gardens and baskets, and I'm often filled with chocolate or candy. (Find the answer on the bottom). |
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| | | | | | | | 12+ Years Next to the C-Suite Taught Me This |
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| I spent over 12 years at a global Fortune 500 company, sharing office space with the C-suite. To my younger self, these executives felt like celebrities, the people responsible for keeping 10,000 employees working. What I didn't expect was how much they'd teach me without ever intending to. Here's what stuck.
From the office of the Chief Executive Officer:
After a long day, he'd walk through the office and turn off every light. Some employees called it miserly. I always found it endearing, a concrete daily act of stewardship in a company that occupied hundreds of offices. He also made a point of saying goodnight to anyone still working as late as him.
NOW: Whenever I leave a shared space, I make sure the lights are off. Small habits practiced consistently are how leaders build trust. People notice the details you don't have to care about.
A note from the Chief HR Officer:
At an offsite leadership meeting, she stepped out mid-call with a family member, close enough that I could overhear. I didn't have kids at the time, but she offered me this: "The infants and babies won't remember if you're home all the time. Find more availability in your career when your children are older. They need you more then."
NOW: Nobody warns you that the challenges of working parenthood don't shrink as your kids grow. They just change shape. The toddler years feel all-consuming, but the teenage years are when the real conversations happen. I took her advice seriously. I was there for the hard talks, the heartbreaks, the pivots. You can choose to be available for those moments. I'm glad I did.
From the Chief Revenue Officer:
Sharply dressed, charming, the kind of guy who could negotiate anything. I was walking him to the main event space the night before he'd address 1,500 people, when a man approached pushing a wheeled garbage can. He stopped, engaged him in a real conversation, asked how his day was going, and finished with a genuine: "Thank you for making our event special."
A masterclass in recognizing that no job is too small, and that the work happening all around you deserves to be seen.
NOW: I thank the people some might overlook: the women mopping airport bathroom sinks, the person picking up clothes in fitting rooms, the garbage collectors who get a wave from me every single time. I see you.
From the President:
Two large screens. Two thousand attendees expected in under an hour. He walked in after a cross-country flight, being pulled in every direction, spotted me, rattled off a few slide changes, and stood still while a lav mic was threaded through his shirt. Then: "I love this. I'm more nervous in the boardroom."
Minutes later, he filled the entire room. Reserved in the office, but electric on stage. He knew his content cold, and it showed.
NOW: I prep for every presentation now, even PTA meetings. My college-aged kids ask me to run through their speeches with them. Preparation is contagious.
None of these executives sat me down for a mentorship session. The education happened in hallways, in passing moments, in things they probably didn't think twice about. Leadership is a pattern of behavior people absorb whether you realize it or not. The real question isn't what you're learning from the people above you. It's what the people watching you are taking home.
— Lainie Gaither (TA Guest Writer) |
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| | | | What to Do When Your Manager is the Problem |
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| "My biggest challenge this week is my manager. He lies and it causes me extra work and headaches." — Lauren D.
A manager who lies creates a fog you have to navigate every single day: second-guessing decisions, covering yourself on things that shouldn't need covering, and burning mental energy just to figure out what's actually true.
Here's what you can do about it.
Start by building your paper trail
Before anything else, document everything. Save emails. Write down conversations with dates, times, and who was present. Screenshot anything relevant. Keep it somewhere outside company systems.
Documentation protects you if their lies ever land on your desk as your problem like a missed deadline you didn't miss, or a decision you didn't make. Think of it as your insurance policy.
Know your relationship before you confront
According to Forbes contributor Bonnie Marcus, the strength of your relationship with your manager matters here. If there's a foundation of mutual respect, a direct one-on-one conversation is often the best first move. Present the facts calmly, give them the chance to course correct, and keep emotion out of it.
If that foundation doesn't exist, skip straight to the next step.
Build relationships above your manager
If your company has skip-level meetings, use them. If they don't exist, suggest them. A low-key email to your manager's boss can open the door: "I came across this idea and think it could be great for our team. I'd love to grab 20 minutes with you this month."
Face time with other leaders builds allies and political capital outside your immediate chain of command. That matters more than you think if things escalate.
Bring HR into it
This is exactly what HR exists for. You don't need to go in hot. Start with a calm, factual conversation backed by your documentation. Be specific, be measured, and let the facts speak.
It's also worth asking: does your company culture actually hold leaders accountable? The answer will tell you how much traction you're likely to get.
Get honest with yourself about your future there
If this is a pattern of dishonesty and not a one-off, you have a real decision to make. Staying in an environment that tolerates this behavior has a long-term cost to your reputation, your energy, and your integrity.
Whether you decide to push for change or start exploring other options, having a plan puts the power back in your hands. |
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