Thursday, October 17, 2024 |
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| In the same way that it can be hard to truly know what a couple's relationship is like behind closed doors, it can also be difficult to understand what someone's life is really like. This phenomenon has undoubtedly been heightened in the age of Instagram — with carefully curated photos and videos making someone appear far more carefree and happier than they are in reality. This is a point that Preethi Nair touches upon in a thought-provoking feature about her career and life overall, which I urge you to read. "I curated a life that I could present to the world as happy while I felt a deep and desperate sadness inside," writes Nair, who is the author of four books. She also reflects on how she could see so many people in their fifties and sixties in similar situations. "Outwardly they were successful, but inwardly they were people consumed by fear and disappointment, with a silent longing for things to be different," Nair adds. This secret longing for life to be different is something people of all ages struggle with. Friends, relatives, and acquaintances who work in all sorts of industries often tell me they harbour secret desires to do something completely different from their day job. Ironically, those who work in corporate settings often say they want to do something more grounded, meaningful, and interesting, while those in more "worthy jobs" sometimes crave more lucrative work with clearer career progression. Although these covert fantasies of a career change can sometimes be founded on naive misconceptions — the idea that the grass is always greener — there are also far too many people who spend their days dreaming of a different future without making any concrete plans to turn their dreams into reality. |
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| Written by Maya Oppenheim |
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It is a damning indictment of statutory maternity leave that new research shows four in 10 mothers took just 12 weeks or less of leave after their most recent child's birth due to the low levels of maternity pay in the UK. One mother I spoke to returned to work six weeks postpartum because she couldn't live on statutory maternity pay. |
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If you have Alzheimer's disease or have cared for a loved one with it, you will know full well what a cruel, devastating illness it is. Sadly, this is something I have first-hand experience of, so was particularly interested to learn that 'smell therapy' is booming in care homes, with experts suggesting artificial aromas are able to reignite memories in those with dementia. |
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Ageism and sexism are a brutal cocktail – with the two things coalescing with and compounding each other. Clair Woodward has written about ageism in the workplace in a first-person piece following a report from recruitment site Totaljobs which found ageism is rife in recruitment. |
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| It is common for misogynists to accuse domestic abuse victims of overstating the violence and abuse they have suffered. But in reality, the opposite is often true, with victims downplaying the mistreatment they have endured due to normalising their perpetrator's behaviour. This struggle can also stem from finding it difficult to come to terms with their victimhood. After all, those who experience domestic abuse often take radically different approaches to their survival. For some, owning their past feels cathartic, while for others, it can feel unfamiliar and uncomfortable. There is no right or wrong response. David Challen fits into the latter group — recently telling The Independent he has felt shame about being a survivor. Challen is a tireless and articulate domestic abuse campaigner whom I've interviewed numerous times over the years. He is the son of Sally Challen, who was released from prison in a landmark case after killing her husband following decades of psychological abuse. He has now spoken to Zoë Beaty for a piece tied to The Independent's Brick by Brick campaign, recently launched in partnership with the leading domestic abuse charity Refuge. The campaign aims to raise £300,000 to build a house for women escaping abusive partners. While generous readers and donors have raised an impressive £150,000 of the £300,000 target so far, more is needed to complete the project, so I urge you to consider donating. In 2019, Sally Challen's murder conviction was reduced to manslaughter, and she was released after serving eight years. The case marked the first time the defence of coercive and controlling behaviour was used in a murder trial. Coercive control became a criminal offence only in 2015 and was not widely understood as a form of domestic violence at the time of her trial. Please donate now to the Brick by Brick campaign, launched by The Independent and charity Refuge, to help raise £300,000 to build a safe space for women where they can escape domestic abuse, rebuild their lives and make new futures |
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| In a world where miscarriages remain steeped in taboo, it is courageous and commendable that Myleene Klass has written an honest piece about her experience of having her fourth miscarriage live on air. Read more |
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